Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you: Gastro Burger!
I can't think of anything more iconic of Gastro Americana than the burger. The hot dog is a very close second but the burger rules supreme. Why? I believe it is because the burger IS the gastro embodiment of the American ethos: the freedom of the individual to make their mark. Note: not the false guarantee of success but only the freedom to succeed. As we shall see, come efforts are more worthy than others.
I grew up in a burger family - my grandpa owning and operating the best damn burger joint in our humble burg (more on that in another post). The thing is we all grew up learning how to construct our own burger. The Gastro Burger pictured above featured two patties with melted pepper jack cheese, apple wood smoked bacon, onion rings, sliced avocado, roasted red peppers, sliced jalapenos, pepperoncini, tomatoes, onions, lettuce, and yes mayo. Understand, I really, REALLY do not like mayo. But on a burger, it's a must and it must be spread on the lower bun. The magic that is the blending of burger juice and mayo is the stuff of legend. If you don't know, then you don't know.
Of course, that leaves the door open to many interpretations. A local and rather new burger joint is Brodie's. They source great, grass fed beef and generally do it justice. Except when it comes to their "Adventure" line of burgers. And 1st out of the gate in this series is the Cricket Burger.
A modest entry to be sure but also approachable to the novice foodie. What to do in this situation? Just eat the crickets!
However, there are always those folks who go straight to hell. Plumb the depths for no other reason other than to shock. It takes real talent to shock effectively and successfully - say a Howard Stern or Ferran Adria. Here's a not so successful entry: the Turd Burger.
So a Japanese scientist is going to solve world hunger by creating a burger from excrement. The problem with world hunger isn't the amount of food available, it's distribution. Therefore, the turd burger is a big, stinking pile of BS to start with. I'm personally offended. I feel like bankrolling a counterstrike featuring Perez Hilton pinching a deuce on some sticky rice and then serving it to some particular royalty and calling it "uni". I think you get the point. So what is left of this season we call summer (still waiting for it to start here in NorCal)? Make it your mission to regain your heritage from the grasp of the troglodyte invader. Get out there and grill up your very own masterpiece of a burger.
