Andrew Zimmern and Gastrohounds go Off The Grid

I've been sitting on this way too long, such is the amount of material I've got backlogged.

It's Friday, Oct. 15th. I'm puttering at the computer during lunch break and catch blurb at BiteClub blog that Andrew Zimmern is bringing the Bizarre Foods crew to SF for a shoot the very next day. They would take over the setting of Off The Grid - a a roaming, mobile food service that features a revolving schedule of food trucks that park in various locations and offer up their wares to a dedicated band followers. And what's not to love - the food is cheap and killer-good. Oh, and it got better. Zimmern was to team up with Chris Cosentino of Incanto as they hijack one of the wheeled kitchens known affectionately as the "Gastrobus" (heh), and transform it into Le Gut Truc. A quick call to Mrs. Gastrohound and we're set to head out early the next morning for what would turn out to be a fantastic day made even more memorable by a surprise visit of Aaron Sanchez.

We arrived early, got parking right across the street (no small miracle) and quickly made our way to what was at the time, a very small gathering of folk curious to see what was going to happen. It wasn't long before Mrs. Gastrohound and I found ourselves being interviewed on camera. The producer was seemingly impressed that we'd drive all the way from Santa Rosa to take part and spent a good amount of time with us throughout the day - even getting a shot of the Mrs chomping down on some gut grub. Speaking of which, let's get to what was being offered up by the Zimmern team. First up, a veal tongue slider with tuna-caper sauce. Next, a chitlin taco with the usual salsa, and what would be the star of the menu - something called Hoof and Mouth. A creation of Cosentino's, it consisted of crispy fried pig's head and pig trotter meat balls, all loving encased with a loving dollop of something called "brainaise". Yep, it's exactly what you think it is. It also hap pend to be fantastic.

The crowd eventually grew to about 150. The die hard foodies busied themselves with snappping pics of the various dishes and getting words in with the celeb chefs while the "I'm a big fan but frightened of brains" set girded their loins in hopes of measuring up to the challenge that was before them. Total strangers compared their experiences and offered up encouragement to those that were queued up for their first try of offal. There was a palpable sense of camaraderie in the shared moment of discovery made even more special by Zimmern, Cosentino and Sanchez as they worked the crowd. We especially enjoyed taking time with Cosentino and Sanchez who are the real deal. Humble and truly happy to be part of the scene. I also spent extended time with Hugh Schick, the owner and Chef de Cuisine of the Gastrobus, which goes be the official name of Le Truc. He was quite a character, and very gracious. Zimmern, as this was his gig was mostly all business, not surprisingly. At one point though, he emerged from the back of the bus to share a rare treat: a fresh abalone caught just that morning and treated only with an hour long soak in lime juice. Abalone ceviche, which I love. I was able to confirm for one the local denizens that it was indeed raw just as he was putting it down. "Raw - you said raw?. Oh damn, man that thing was raw!" Welcome to my 'hood, homie... LOL.

We took a ton of pics, and what follows is a brief offering. I'm putting up a slide show of the full event on the sidebar, so do check it out. And if you are ever in SF, definitely seek out Off The Grid, it is definitely worth the effort. Cheap eats at its best.


Piatto di Giorno


Mrs. Gastrohound and Andrew Zimmern


Eat brains... 2 billion zombies can't be wrong!



Veal tongue slider. Zimmern scores big with this. The tongue had an uncious quality to it, tender and juicy. The tuna-caper sauce was the perfect condiment offering.


On hand to check out the scene in a blue hoodie is Food Network exec Bob Tuschman, host and judge of Next Food Network Star.


Me and Chris Cosentino: Los dos Malos!

Don't forget to check out the slide show for all the pics from Off The Grid. The frame size is small, so if you see a pic you like, click on it to enlarte. Use your browser's "back" button to return to Gastrohounds. Projected air time for the next season of Bizarre Foods is April 2011. We'll keep you posted.

Happy Thanksgiving

This pic was from Thanksgiving '93. I'm plucking 2 turkeys that I had just shot 3 days prior. There to help is the Gastropup - all of 6 months old and chompin' down on a savory binky. Savory too was the bird. The flavor was much more akin to pheasant - much more of a game bird quality to it. The birds themselves had been gorging on over ripe sauvignon blanc grapes. An incredible meal made possible by a century old cookbook that belonged to MamaRoux's grandmother. It took me step by step from field dressing, hanging the birds for 2 days, plucking and then prepping for roasting. Best. Bird. Ever.

Hope yours is too.

Own it!

...and when it comes to the BBQ Sauce competition at the Sonoma County Harvest Festival - I do. For the 2nd year in a row, my Char-B-Q Sauce took 1st prize. After winning last year, I had something of a disappointing showing during the summer after having tinkered with t he recipe slightly. I was still placing, but 4th Place just doesn't cut it. After some soul searching and a few swift kicks to the rear from Mrs. Gastrohound, I went back to the original recipe but I still wanted to shake things up. As contestants are allowed a maximum of 2 entries, I decided to put up another entry and go with something very different. I recalled some writings by Chris Lilly talking about the popularity of peaches and pork in Alabama. I quickly came up with a recipe for a bourbon-peach BBQ Sauce. A couple of test runs were quite successful with many tasters enjoying the fact it was not as spicy as the Char-B-Q Sauce. The results speak for themselves, with my Char-B-Q Sauce taking the overall honors, and my Peach-Bourbon BBQ Sauce taking 3rd! Not a bad showing at all. A great way to close out the BBQ competition season.

Harvest time is well passed, officially coming to an end a couple weeks back as our wine making group picked over the mouldering remains of 2nd crop pinot noir at Devaux and Truchard vineyards in the Southern Corneros region. It was grim work, and we are somewhat dubious about the eventual product. On a good note, I received my allotment of our 2008 Obsidian Ridge Cabernet Sauvignon. Aged for 21 months in a Hungarian Kadar barrel, it is an 88%/12% blend of Cabernet Sauvignon and Syrah. Made entirely from Lake County grapes, it clocks in with an alcohol content of 15.5 percent. We also updated our label and used a taller than usual Bordeaux bottle making for a very impressive package. No doubt this will be featured at many local tables during the holidays season.

It has been about 5 weeks since my last post, but I've not been shirking my duties. In fact, I've been quite busy and have amassed a metric crapload of material that I shall begin offload in quick order, so stay tuned in. What's in store? Brains, intestines, celebrity chef cavorting, more meat butchery, possible TV appearances, and 2010 may still hold some surprises.

Gastrohounds would like to throw out some savory birthday wishes to Lucullus, the Delicacy Ape. Call it an informed hunch, but something tells me that Lucullus does not dine alone tonight.

When you live where I do, it's good to be hungry.

Animalgeddon

It can be tough in the city for a pig, goat or occasional PETA member. There was a harmonic convergence of sorts during the weekend of 9/26 & 9/27. First off, Protein University rolled into Napa for their continuing series: Primal! A celebration of the magic that occurs when animal flesh meets fire. This event is open to the public and yours truly would have loved to attend, but as you'll soon see I was already booked. As the named suggests, Primal celebrates that primitive urge to consume charred flesh. Behold, from 2009 (watch for Chris Cosentino)



I WILL be in attendance next year. Check out my link to Protein University at the sidebar under "For Every Animal You Don't Eat, I'll Eat Three". You'll thank me.

So as mentioned, I was previously booked. Occurring that same weekend was the Handcar Regatta at the old Railroad Square in Santa Rosa. A very cool event with a "steam punk" theme which is best described as Sweeney Todd meets Mad Max. What made this a food event is that local foodblog Bite Club sponsored a demonstration booth that would feature such gems as how to make such tasty bits as paneer and watermelon kimchee. But the star attraction was Chef Roger of La Gare, who was booked to deconstruct a 60 lb pig. FYI, Chef Roger is probably the only Cordon Bleu trained chef in Sonoma County. Accompanying Chef Roger was his son, who obviously had done this sort of thing more than once and relished the limelight. Mrs. Gastrohound was on hand to document the event while I engaged Chef Roger with witty banter and well thought out queries. Our enthusiasm would be well rewarded. But 1st, Mrs. Gastrohound's photo blandishments:


The guest of honor.



The proud chef and his son.



Rib attack!


I must also mention it was easily in the high 90s that day, so it was not easy work. Yet, somehow me n the Mrs. managed to capture the attention of Chef Roger, particularly Mrs Gastrohound who easily snapped off about 40 pics, all the while embellishing her craft by uttering various "yummy sounds". It seemed at times that chef Roger was actually talking directly to us during the demo. Perhaps he was, for at the end, he neatly wrapped a a full rack of ribs in a towel and handed them to Mrs. Gastrohound. Naturally, we both assumed it was meant for someone behind us, but on turning around - no one was there. We were definitely in in awe and Chef Roger confirmed with a nod and a broad smile that the ribs were indeed meant for us and quickly called out for a container and ice so as to protect the meat from the hot afternoon.


Nice rack! Seriously, though it was Mrs. Gastrohound and her prodigious camera work that brought home the bacon this day... huzzah!

And wouldn't ya know, I just happened to have some of my Char-B-Q Rib Sauce on hand. This was possibly a very good omen a good omen as I had just turned in my entries in to the 2010 Sonoma Country Harvest Fair BBQ Sauce competition. By the following weekend, I'd know the results and hopefully have a winner in which to douse our pig. (Results coming up in my next post!)

Full disclosure: At the time of the event, Chef Roger was unaware that I host a food blog, so no favors were expected on our part. This was just one of those great days in a great place for those who love great food.

Harvest Hits and Misses

No doubt, this has not been a banner harvest. Indeed, for the first time in my 12 years involvement, our wine making group may go without any opportunity to pick grapes. Tomato and pepper plants offer meager rewards if at all. Another huge miss for me was a second year of missing out on the annual late summer sea hunt where a dedicated band miscreants gather to reap the bounty of the sea: abalone, cod... all kinds of sea critters - anything that lives off the coast is fair game. Wolf Eal? No problem - unagi. One person actually had 2 cans of Japanese plum sauce used for grilling the eal. A hardier band of foodies I've rarely come across. Apologies to Lisa and Mike for my no-show.

Yet still, there is bounty to be had and now is the time to take advantage. A recent blast of summer heat has brought what will assuredly be a brief glimpse of what we have taken for granted for sometime. With a prediction of a moderately hot day, Mrs. Gastro Hound and I set out to the Farmer's Market to secure the ingredients for a late afternoon repast. Our treasures in hand, we set off for home to relax and escape the summer heat in the shade of our yard - a bit of Provence on a local level. The result was a pleasing plate of tasty bites highlighting the best of what is especially good this time of year. But nothing speaks to the moment of harvest like the squash blossoms. At best, they are only at market for about 6 weeks. So delicate, they must be picked, sold and consumed all on the same day. The reward for such attention to detail is a truly unique bite. Stuffed with a combination of cheeses including chevre, battered and deep fried, nothing else comes close - except maybe for the rest of what's on our plate.


Franco's Sausages - always good. The Merguez is killer, but today we found a new favorite: Hawaiian-Portuguese Linguica. Pineapple replaces sherry to supply acidity and tropical sugar.


Crescent Moon Farms produces some tasty, hard to find chilis. Bright yellow Ajis and my personal favorite: Padrons - a tiny Spanish frying pepper. A classic tapa offering.


The quality of the produce can't be matched. These squash blossoms were destined for my fry-o-later.


Did I mention I love peppers?


The finished plate: stuffed squash blossoms, fried Padron peppers dusted with sea salt, grilled Hawaiian-Portuguese Linquica, and cherry tomatoes (courtesy of Sean's garden. Thanks Sean!). I don't know how you roll, but this is how we roll on a hot summer afternoon.


A big shout out to MamaRoux for her hand made kitchen towels featured in the photo of our tapas plate. Also check out her summer salad recipe here. This has been a favorite of mine for sometime. She offers up her recipe and some great photos as a showcase. A must. And of course, a big thanks to the Gastro Pup for the bacon n cheese crickets. A tasty n crunchy treat.

I give it a score of 3 out of 5. Great crunch and savory cheese flavor... the bacon flavor was lacking.

Much more to come soon: new BBQ Sauce recipes, and competitions as well as the best damn canned tuna I've ever had.

This n That And Char-B-Q Too

Welcome back foodies. While it might have appeared that things were quiet here, i've actually been hard at work. So let's get right to it.

Most recently, over the weekend of Aug 14th-15th, I had the chance to get out to South Lake Tahoe to catch a performance of Michael Bartle's "Images of Elvis" show. Outstanding. And of course, there was food and beverage. The 14th saw us in Virginia City, Nevada. Best place for an ice cold beer? Bucket of Blood Saloon. Don't miss the view overlooking Boot Hill.

Now back to Tahoe. My impression is that it's not exactly Food Mecca, but there are glimmers of hope. Prior to our show, our entourage had dinner at the Edgewood, located at the golf course of the same name. The views are a main attraction as every single table as a westward view in order to catch the dramatic sunset. This photo was actually taken directly from our table.



The food is quite good. It does not try to over achieve, yet there isn't a "comfort zone" feel as well. Fresh, top grade ingredients are allowed to be their own star. Mrs Gastrohound had a light yet deceptively flavorful pasta dish incorporating lobster and diver scallops. I went with the the pheasant breast, wrapped in pancetta with forest mushrooms:




The sauce was simple yet flavorful: pan drippings deglazed with sherry and stock. Note too, that the "vegetable side" is really just a garnish. I love this. @#$% the veggies, and let the pheasant shine. While perfectly cooked, they were really just a garnish to balance out the plating of the roasted cippolini onions which were much more interesting. What's harder to note in the photo, is that the breast was removed from the bone, yet the wing portion was retained (sans wing tip). Little touches often make or break the dish. If you bill a dish with a main ingredient, you better feature it and know how to handle it. On this night, Edgewood delivered.

Next morning, we had some free time and caught an "Artist's Fair" in the parking lot of the Mont Bleu. Of course, I immediately noticed a BBQ stall setting up. This wasn't some slipshod operation, as I spied an upright water smoker much like mine - just more robust. I had the opportunity to talk up the crew and learned that there is a "Best On The Mountain" rib cook off, held in July on that very spot. This provider won this year. The resulting demand for their sauce was so great they've had to go to a commercial facility to keep up with demand. The sauce was good, but leaned more toward an all purpose sauce - which brings me to the next bit: My BBQ Sauce.

Following my victory in last year's 2009 Harvest fair, I entered my Char-B-Q Sauce in this year's 2010 Sonoma County Fair. Based on what I saw at entry time, I felt the competition would be even tougher. It was. My goal was to finish in the top 3. I placed 4th, which did not disappoint, except for the hot pink ribbon that was awarded. I did note that the sauce I beat out last year took 3rd this go-round. It was close, and tough all around. I've got one more competition scheduled for my Char-B-Q Sauce coming up next month. I'm thrilled with how my sauce has performed over this past year and the response it has generated. I'm already at work on my next sauce recipe. Stay tuned!

Also - I've got yet another update to my last post regarding Three Sheets. As it turns out, Travel Channel did in fact drop it despite the very positive response. They just didn't know what to do with it. Zane was more than diplomatic over the whole affair and presented Travel Channel's position fairly. The good news, he's just wrapped 24 episodes of a new show - "Drinking Made Easy" which will air this fall on HDNet. Unfortunately, HDNet is only currently available in certain metro areas (Boston, Denver, Houston, Central PA, Indiana, Minneapolis). Comcast hopes to add HDNet to our burg late this year. Will it be in time? DOUBTFULL! In the meantime, Zane also says that Three Sheets is not dead either. He appears to be in contractual negotiation as he could not reveal the source of his renewed enthusiasm. Cross yer digits folks, and reorient your statolith. Things are indeed looking up. To reflect this update, I'm linking to zanelamprey.com at the side bar so those who are interested can follow all the goings on, which just happens to include: Zanetoberfest 2010, taking place September 2010 in Chicago. Check it out for yourselves. Put it this way, I wish to hell I could go.

A special thanks to our dear friends Mimi and Wayne who ensured our Tahoe excursion was a memorable one, and to Barbara for the private touring of the Elvis Suite at the Horizon. Elvis DNA anyone?

Cheers!

Man does not live by food alone...

... occasionally, there must be beverage. And if you're Zane Lamprey, beverage is your job.

A few months back, quite by accident, I caught a show on Travel Channel called "Three Sheets". It was a slow period for Travel Channel as new seasons for their most acclaimed series were due to start in June. In the lead up, Travel Channel padded their schedule with some unlikely choices, including some early Rachel Ray work. However, one show was Three Sheets. With a name like that I had to tune in. I did. The first episode did not impress, worse, it disappointed. I don't remember where the episode took place... it was that bad. The following episode took place in Hawaii, so it was worth a shot. And, as it turned out, was THE episode that sparked my keen interest. Everything that missing in the first episode was present in Hawaii... in spades. I actually learned STUFF, while thoroughly enjoying myself. Over the next 4 episodes, I would have the same experience. Zane's stop in Vancouver was especially good. Unfortunately, the 6 episodes were over all too quickly and I gave up hope of ever seeing any again. But today, hope is rekindled. Due to a positive response, Travel Channel has agreed to show all 52 previous episodes beginning June 30th. If the ratings are strong, they are open to funding additional episodes. I've followed the Wild Boyz and No Reservations long enough to know that every culture has their beverage of choice, and a drink offered in friendship is never refused - even if that beverage consists of previously masticated fruit pulp that has been fermenting in the ground for 3 weeks. To do otherwise would be rude.

Three sheets has had a tough history, starting out on the now defunct Mojo TV network. It was then picked up for an additional season on the Fine Living Network, but nothing seems to have come of that. I won't bore you with additional details. You can catch the show on Thursday nights on Travel Channel. Just watch the show and if you like, continue to do so. If not, don't bother. For me, I will continue. The show is quirky, low brow, with understandably low production values. Yet, there is a depth to the show and Zane takes his new gig seriously. For complete info on Three Sheets, there is a Wiki page with all the info you need. And for some immediate gratification, check my Food Porn sidebar for some quick clips of Three Sheets.

Cheers!

Update 7/26/10
Heads up!
Next week, beginning Aug 4th and 5th, Three Sheets will feature 2 episodes each night. Plan accordingly and don't forget to review the Three Sheets drinking rules (especially as it's a week night).

Prost!

Update 8/7/10
Travel Channel giveth, and Travel Channel taketh away. I don't know what is up with this, but Three Sheets is no longer on their schedule. Even though 2 episodes were scheduled for Thursday 8/5, they did not air. A quick check of the coming week revealed no episodes scheduled. At this point it's anyone's guess as to what is going on. Maybe they had to make room for more Rachel Ray:::shudders:::. The grassroots effort to keep Three Sheets alive continues. In the meantime I've got 10 episodes on DVR and will treat them with the reverence they deserve.

Father's Day

Where to begin. How about some great memories, and some of the best come from a series of family outings to the California Sierras, for fishing and all sorts of fun at the Sardine Lakes. Each year in late summer, 3 generations of Finleys would head for a cabin and and adjacent campground that nestled up to the aforementioned lakes. As a dad, my greatest memory was of my daughter, all of 8 yrs old, catching her 1st trout all by herself. She baited the hook, cast out, hooked the fish and reeled it in. She was all smiles as was I. Needless to say, we were bringing in a good a haul of fish.

The thing is, trout is best consumed fresh, the day you caught it. After that it loses something. Maybe we were just spoiled and that may be, but if we couldn't do that day there was only one thing to do: smoke it. This was my introduction to smoking. My cousin Bill had invested in a fish smoker and one year I decided I would do the smoking. I soon learned what it was to smoke something low and slow. The investment of time and attention to detail, I was not prepared for. But after a couple of years, I had it down. The one ingredient I could not account for was the brine. When smoking fish, a brine isn't always essential, but for trout, I do believe it is. By the time your back at home and ready to smoke, the flesh has lost a it's delicate fresh flavor. The brine replaces the natural moisture of the flesh with liquid packing more flavor. My dad had experimented with several brines, and the following is the one he felt worked best. I have to agree, this is one flavorful brine - having worked with it over a period of years. This recipe comes straight from my dad. I only have it, courtesy of hand written notation on a scrap of paper that I keep tucked inside my What's Cooking in Kentucky cookbook (Irene Hayes). This brine works very well for salmon as well, but keep in my mind, this is a brine and not a marinade. You will want a fair amount of liquid to fish to ensure a proper brine. Increase the recipe as needed for your fish. The following brine recipe is exactly how I have it on my scrap of paper:

2 qt water
1 cup salt (uniodized)
2 cups brown sugar
2 tsp lemon juice
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp onion powder

Fish are brined, clean and whole. For trout, brine for 3.5 hours and for salmon brine for 18 hours. When done, rinse thoroughly and pat dry. From my experience, another couple of hours of air drying helps as well.

As for the smoking process - that's up to you.

I hope you have the opportunity to enjoy this recipe. It's always done well by me. Thanks dad!

Food Porn #2

Birthday Dinner 1st Course:
Chorizo Stuffed Potato Chip with Red Pepper Flan

This comes to GastroHounds from a birthday dinner thrown for a longtime friend at a favorite local winery. Chorizo stuffed potato chip? I can only assume the potato was sliced gossamer thin and stuffed with Mexican chorizo. Suddenly, my truffle salt potato chips seem pedestrian.

Side note: I've finally updated the Food Porn Video Bar, this time featuring Chris Cosentino. I've met the chef on a couple of occasions as part of my old work commute. The salumi at Boccalone in the Ferry Building is incredible, and the "spreadable salami" is an intense mouthfull - more like pepperoni than salami but I loved it none the less.

FUBAR'd

A sad story gentle readers. Apparently my Foodie Karma Account is seriously in the negative. I was forced to withdraw from Guys Can Cook Too competition that took place over the weekend due to my paycheck NOT being delivered on schedule, leaving me unable to purchase the necessary product to prepare 600 servings of my pulled pork appetizer. Sucktastic doesn't begin to describe it. My final dry run held the over the weekend of the 15th and 16th produced fantastic results - the best pulled pork I've ever had, no doubt about it. The combination of applewood and hickory produced a rich, smoky flavor that permeated the meat but did overpower it. My dry rub caramelized into a succulent bark. I had moved well beyond any concern about embarrassing failures and was suddenly enthusiastic about my chances in capturing the appetizer division. NOT. TO. BE.

Once my rage had subsided, I was able to give myself over to some quiet reflection/beer consumption and concluded that the real goal wasn't the competition but the pork itself.. of acquiring the hard won knowledge of what it takes to produce truly good BBQ. In that regards, I kicked @$$ and intend to so again very soon. Memorial Day is right around the corner, and I've got several pints of my competition BBQ sauce on deck and ready to go. I can assure you, there will be no taking of prisoners.

Food Porn #1

Birthday Dinner:

Salmon Chop with shallot-sherry cream
Roasted baby red potatoes with crispy salmon "bacon" bits
Sonoma greens in a Meyer lemon vinaigrette

Yes, it's low rent but the food was pretty damn good. The salmon "chop" is actually a noisette. If that makes me the Ron Jeremy of food porn then so be it. There's more on the way so just get used to it.

Pig-a-palooza

Yes, the pig is such a noble beast it deserves to star in an event all it's own. Pig-palooza was conceived as a chance to fine tune the cooking regimen I'll be employing during the 12th Annual Guys Can Cook Too competition. I'm entered in the appetizer division, and I'll be serving Savory Pulled Pork Bites: slow smoked pork shoulder served on a buttermilk bread round and topped with my Char-B-Q Sauce and pinch of coleslaw. I had just acquired a vertical water smoker and needed to dial that in and become familiar with maintaining my fire. Pig-a-palooza was a chance to experiment on family and friends to determine how the smoker would perform but most importantly what I'll be facing in terms of portions and service. To that end, Pig-a-palooza was big success even if small in scale. The biggest lesson learned was that I need to start with my pork shoulder cold and build my fire up slowly up from 200 to 225. Apparently, if the pork heats too quickly you won't achieve proper smoke penetration along with the possibility of overdoing some of the outer portions of the shoulder - which is what happened. So to recap: room temperature meat is for grilling, cold meat is for smoking. D-oh!

As you'll see, this was a very relaxed gig with people dropping by whenever they wanted and staying as long as they wanted in order to simulate the crowd traffic at the event and issues with keeping the pork warm over a four hour period.




The serious chef, tough but fair.


The service table, mirroring the workspace I'll have at the competition.


Anonymous comments from guests provided valuable feedback, as well as some comedic fodder.


The crowd starts to get unruly.



Some serious pig talk went down.


If you missed Pig-a-palooza do not despair. I'll be doing this again no doubt!

MasterChef Open Casting Call

Flashback to Jan 20. I'm busy compiling a list of culinary contests in which to enter my BBQ Sauce when I ran across a posting for an open casting call for Gordon Ramsay's MasterChef, set to debut on Fox later this year. Gastro Hounds had to make an appearance. The format was this: contestants would have five minutes to plate a dish, and were to be graded by a culinary judge and casting director. In a addition, a lenthy application and photo of the finished dish were required upon arrival at the event. The competition was set for Jan 24th, so I had very little time to prepare. To make matters worse, my vehicle was suffering from an as yet undiagnosed problem. I would therefor need to make a 2 1/2 hour bus ride in order to participate. After a lengthy search, I settled on a soup and salad theme: gazpacho paired with a salpicon of braised beef, potato, onion and chipotle combined with sherry vinegar and olive oil served on Belgian Endive. Both dishes would be dressed with a lime/cilantro vinegretta. These dishes are intended to served slightly chilled which alleviated the problem of keeping something warm over an extended period of time. Working on 3 hours sleep, I set out at 5 a.m. on the 24th in order to reach my destination in plenty of time, hopefully towards the front of what I expected to be a long line.

The weather was angry that morning, like an old man returning his fetid clam chowder at the Early Bird Special. I quickly secured some coffee at Celtic Coffee Company and hoofed it to Sur La Table on Maiden Lane which was hosting the event. I made it in good time, eventually securing spot #44. Not bad. The line grew quickly, and the weather continued to deteriorate. To make matters worse, no bathrooms were available. The rain, wind and caffeine soon made for an uncomfortably full bladder, the assembled crowd began to get unruly. By the time groups of 12 were being ushered in to start the call, many of us didn't care. We just wanted to finish the ordeal and find the nearest facilities. The first groups were already filing out, the look of defeat etched on their faces. My group was finally let in and ushered downstairs to the test kitchens. 4 tables, set up to accomodate 3 contestants each, were directly in front of us. We received instructions that when our number was called, we should proceed to the nearest open space at one of the tables and our 5 minutes would commence immediately. I noticed that culinary judges were grilling contestants as they were trying to plate. A brutal, Iron Chef type environment. My number was called and quickly made my way to my spot on set about plating my dish. I started with the gazpacho as it was the most time consuming given the garnishing and visual presentation. A culinary judge was right there and began my interrogation. The questions involved choices of recipes, inspiration as well as actual culinary knowledge. My judge hammered me on what actually constituted a salpicon and why I had chosen that as a component. I acquitted myself well while finishing plating my gazpacho. I was ahead of schedule as the culinary judged moved off to other victims. I was coasting at this point as I started to plate the salpicon. I pulled out the head of endive and choked. The endive had been kept too cold and had turned translucent. It was unusable. My plating ruined, what little chance I had of actually advancing was shattered. I plated the salpicon directly onto the serving dish - pathetic. The casting director came over and began my second interview. I was phoning it in at this point, only wanting to pack up and make a quick escape to the nearest bathroom which is exactly what I did.

I replenished my energies with the help of a delicious dirty water hotdog from one of the many hotdog carts that dot Union Square, but was still feeling down. I made my way to Westfield Mall food court to purchase a comfort puff at Beard Papa's. If you've never had a cream puff from Beard Papa's you're missing out. These things are massive, and the filling literally explodes on your first bite. With my comfort puff securely stored in my backpack, and the dirty water dog still providing sufficient energy, I made my way back to the bus stop, nearing the coffee house where I had stopped upon exiting the bus that morning. There was a commotion out front and upon getting closer noticed that a clown was angrily accosting someone in a parked car. This was one PO'd clown, the screaming growing louder as I approached. Suddenly, the clown lunged for the car and slipped on something, landing with an audible thud...then "cut!". The crowd that had gathered to watch the altercation was actually a film crew. The director was not pleased with the proceedings, and wanted a reshoot. Shady prop guys began reshaping something on the sidewalk - a prop dog poop which is what the clown had slipped on. Great, an angry clown slipping on dog crap. It was the perfect punctuation to the end of my day. Bizarre, but all true.

I'll post the pics from my cell phone once I extract them. Also, for more info on Beard Papa's monster comfort puffs, I've posted a link on the side bar.

Laissez les Bon Temps Rouler!

Happy Mardi Gras y'all. What's cookin' in the GastroHounds household for tonight? Jambalaya and Bananas Foster. Gotta have that desert. So dang good and so easy. Heck, I make that when I'm camping.

Recap: What did I make for Valentine's Day? Something I call Pork Tenderloin Von Blucher. A free jar of Char-B-Q Sauce to the first person to correctly divine the inspiration to the name of the dish: basically a pork tenderloin wrapped inside puff pastry with carmelized onions and apples, served with a sherry-cream sauce. Yes, it was scarf-o-licious. Recipe to anyone who asks.

What's next? I'll be posting on my participation in the open casting call competition for Gordon Ramsey's Chef Master's set to debut later this year on Fox. Why do you care? I'll throw this out there:

Butthead Mushroom Guy
Exploding bladders
Wilted greenery
Protein tube
Comfort puff
Angry clown
Dog turd.

...all played a vital role during my day. Come for the comedy, stay for the the discomfort.

Ape Island Quesadilla!

We have a great local Farmer's Market, and I try to make it there each Saturday morning as there always seems to be something new. The last couple of weeks were no exception with the arrival of Vini aka "Vini Volcano" - the hot sauce guy. I'm always up for adding a new hotsauce to my collection so I had to check it out. He had 2 sauces available: Volcano Sauce and Fire Monkey. Over conversation, I learned that another sauce of his: Voodoo Sauce, was recently voted best overall in a Food Network competition. So why no Voodoo? Vini related that as he makes his sauce in small batches of 6 bottles, it's very hard to keep up with demand. Well, someday I hope to share in his misery.

Unfortunately, Vini wasn't sampling that day. I would have to take my purchases home and begin my explorations there. The Volcano Sauce appears to be the base recipe and Vini keeps it simple: Serrano peppers, cask vinegar, a unique local garlic variety called "Purple Haze" (never heard of it) and the usual assorted spices. I love Serrano peppers for their elevated heat level and flavor. Given the simple list of ingredients, Volcano delivers exactly what you'd expect - Serrano heat/flavor, a hint of garlic and good acidity. An approachable, well balanced sauce. Then there's Fire Monkey, which Vini explains came about when he ran out of ingredients for a batch of sauce and grabbed some banana. Good thing, for this was the most interesting of the two. It also uses Serrano peppers but is milder in heat than the Volcano Sauce, but it's the layers of flavor that result from the banana that make this sauce unique. The banana is up front, but the sauce finishes with good acidity. However, the banana does present something of a challenge when coming up with a recipe to pair this sauce with but something came to mind almost immediately: the Ape Island Quesadilla!

While attending last year's over the top Bacchanalia of Passport Weekend in Dry Creek Valley, our party ran across a killer snack - a quesadilla with crushed pineapple and carmelized onions. We couldn't get enough. This recipe is my take on that same dish.

Ingredients:
4 tbsp olive oil
2 medium to large yellow onions
2 8oz can of crushed pineapple
1 lb pepperjack Cheese, grated
6 tbsp Fire Monkey hotsauce
Flour tortillas

Preparation:
Cut the onion into sections about 1/4 inch thick - separate individual rings. Carmelize onion in the olive oil in pan set to low/med heat until golden brown and very soft - about 1 hour
Combine the crushed pineapple and Fire Monkey sauce
To assemble:
On one tortilla, spread 1/4 of the pineapple/Fire Monkey sauce mixture evenly
Layer on 1/4 of carmelized onions and 1/4 of grated pepperjack cheese
Top with 2nd flour tortilla
Grill on lightly oiled skillet set to medium heat for about 1 minute on each side or until the tortillas have browned slightly and the cheese is melted.
Cut into 6 slices and consume in mass quantities.
Makes 4 quesadillas.

You can check out Vini's full line of sauces at http://www.piratesauce.com

Anthony Bourdain Comes to Town

Bourdain's No Reservations speaking tour came to our humble burg of Santa Rosa. No way was I going to miss this. The day before the show I caught an interview he gave to our local paper. I new the subject of our local Bette Noir of the foody world, Guy Fieri, would come up and I was curious as to what his reponse would be. Anthony admitted to a "grudging respect" for a family man working hard, doing what he wants to do (paraphrasing). It was possible Tony was softening around the edges - family man that he is now.

Soft, no. Bipolar perhaps but not soft. About 3 minutes into his presentation, it was clear that he still has his demons and the current source for his tortures is Sandra Lee - The Queen of Kitsch, Miss Smarm 2009. I find her unwatchable, though I have on occasion. I know others enjoy her show. Anthony was incapable of saying her name without attaching a few M-F bombs. His disgust was palpable: clenched teeth, the veins in his neck bulging, he was becoming Mr. Furious right there on stage. And in case any of us in attendance were in doubt regarding Sandra being the nexus of all things evil, Anthony dared us to google Kwanzaa Cake when we got home that evening. To save you the trouble, I've embedded the video for your viewing pleasure/horror.



For those who follow No Reservations routinely, Anthony's presentation delivered what one would expect. He's angry at the things he dislikes and passionate about the things he does. Vegans are still an object of derision and I don't see him backing off his recent comparison of Alice Waters to "Pol Pot in a muumuu". He's convinced Americans are eating better, that is to say enjoying the things that are truly good. He still sees the need for Americans to travel better. He described his horror at seeing a Mom accompanying her daughter into the Blue Mosque in Instanbul, during Ramadan, with the daughter looking like she had just come back from turning tricks. Perhaps that's why Anthony came to Santa Rosa. He didn't just want to play to the choir, he was hoping to impart some sorely needed wisdom upon the 1,600 folks in attendance. Following his presentation, Anthony devoted about an hour to a Q & A session which in no way felt obligatory, but there were just enough questions that made me groan. Anthony's work is not quite done.

Gastro Hounds Update

It's been quiet here at the site, but things have been boiling below the surface. I've been busy building material for future posts. Lots of good stuff to come. Case in point - tomorrow night I'm attending Anthony Bourdain's 'No Reservations' speaking tour engagement tomorrow night which is being held right here in Santa Rosa, CA at the Wells Fargo/Ruth Finley Theater(heh!). I'll be following up with a post detailing any and all juicy tidbits so check back soon.

Next, I want to send a highest of fives to I Am Not a Chef for sending Gastro Hounds a very big shout out! You can check it out here. Be sure to take a good look around as IANAC has been around for some time and provides a great perspective on the current food scene.

Also, in the need for some laughs? Check out the 'Delicacy Ape' link under my Vegans Beware sidebar slot. Warning: put down all beverages if you care for your monitor. A big hat tip to he who sent me the email alerting me to said delectable simian.